RULES:
8BARS 2BAR HOOK 8BARS
NO EDITING POSTS *ANY MAJOR PROBLEMS COMTACT ME*
NO FREE POSTING
NO SWAYING VOTES
SHIT TALKING GOES IN DESIGNATED THREAD

CHECK IN TUES BY MIDNIGHT GMT
VERSES DUE SAT BY MIDNIGHT GMT
*NO EXCUSES WILL BE TOLERATED UNLESS OK'D BY OPPONENT*
*EXTENSION 24 HOURS MAX*

FIRST TO 5 WINS 3-0 KO 4-1 TKO

VOTES BASED ON:
ON TOPIC
FLOW
MULTIS
VOCAB
ORIGINALITY
IMAGERY
DEPTH
WORDPLAY
METAPHORS
HOOK ORIGINALITY

PARTICIPATING MEMBERS IN TOURNEY CAN VOTE & VETS CAN VOTE
EACH PARTICIPATING MEMBER MUST VOTE ON 1 BATTLE AND PROVIDE LINK

TOPIC:
A young kid abandoned in a house for a week by yourself...Explain how you survive.

Good Luck

in... good luck marc

check...good luck ell

Growin’ up in a tattered up home battered alone no standards to show-
Mom....my.....Dad...dy...my grammar is froze, parents hammered 'n blowed-
Manners have grown, with pleases and greetings, yes sirs and no ma'ams-
Sometimes beaten to peaces into dressers or from the item the coat hangs-
My throat glands crushed from squeezes sexually abused on my knees to please '–
Please believe it I’m ready to leave this I’m ready to street it, I’m ready I need it-
But on the morning I woke an awkward silence stroked, tried to spark words-
But the eye lids closed, family gone? Denial is closer then when a hawk lurks-
Finally awake to the wake of the quiet raped by the silence-
At the mercy of the shadows, just a little boy staked out by giants-
Faked out my mind gets play out by mind tricks great now my mind quits-
Any process of rational thought my lives caught in one giant grape vine of a twist-
My fates dying and gripped crying and shit, feeling famished so I grab cans-
Trying and prying their lids, nails ripped off, damaged I stand with bloody and cramped hands-
What did I do to deserve this, all taken away from me quicker than what a New York city purse is-
I'm that worthless for such curses on a person? Can I survive when I’m still in the process of nursin?-

Mother and father please be proud of me, I’m only six and you still doubted me-
Grounded me and surrounded me with anger and punches always loud at me-
Mother and father please come home to me, I need this life, that’s all that’s known to me-
Grown to be alone, tattered and broke, tell me anything I’ll be what you hope of me-

Days have passed and I stank of ass played with glass shivering at my raped up past-
In a daze that lasts in a haze of gas the oven burns ready for a blaze and flash-
Cause the heat is off I sneeze and cough just waiting as my breathing halts-
Wheeze and fall to my knees and bawl begging please lead me to a feeding vault-
As the hunger rumbles roaring as the room echos sitting in dooms thresh-hold-
My fleshes-cold 'n my chests-cold as I assume that rests-tolled but the rest-told-
My breasts fold as I feel my lungs collapse trying assess some messed goals-
Stress-tolls crawl to the cupboards only to find pots and pans rotten clams-
Constant damns monotonous plans body trembling like when a hostage stands-
Go to the fridge to find molded fruit to weak to hold and chew cant even thaw the frozen food-
My lives slipping again and I’m dosing too, choking too and I’m hoping to-
Find a way of relief some ray of belief but this mirage's too strong-
My parents haven’t forgotten about me, they'll be pulling into the garage before long-
Day seven, a rumbling force, strong noises so loud it sounded like a wars on-
The living room carpet head lights flickering back to dimming up darkness-
Back to living up hardships as my parents got out yelling cringing up 'n parked it...


Good Luck Ell

shit, its been all day, no sign of em, maybe they had to run sum errands-this-long
but hell, its been all day and now i accept the fact that my parents-is-gone
see if there comin just stair-at-the-lawn, im getting hungry, time to get something-to-eat
it is funny-at-least, that they didnt even leave me some money-to-feast
i dont wanna be young-and-deceased, but i have to be very afraid-to-doubt
that i cant live while their gone, and im to scared to go to the neighbors-house
i need the fuck outta here, get my rusty ol'e bicycle, these wheels-are-so-stangnant
have to make some money somehow, so i go and steal dads pills-out-his-cabinet
my family, my good life? now its nothing-it-seems, dont have ne1 to cuddle-with-me
regular kids this age are still setting in a car seat, im now beginning to hussle-the-streets
just another story of the streets now, cuz i have to live being the blocks-material
i figure i couldnt hang in, but i got a lil bit of cash and just bought a box-of-cerial
look out the window, i see alot of attacks-at-night, so i had to purchease a axe-and-knife
ive only been abandoned for 2 days, some kids are orphaned for years, its just a fact-of-life
im only 10, if i witnessed this shit happen to another kid, i thoughted it was seeming-funny
i made fun of kids like this, getting every penny they could, hard t find the easy-money

the good life? i took advantage of it, but my consiquence is more-then-mild
from livin as a rich kid, now my old friends see me as a orphaned-child
they wanted to challenge-me-heck! now since it happened my personalitys-wrecked
i had to change my life, its the survival of the fittest, a reality-check

i didnt realize how good i had it, i never would of guessed one day i would feel-this-way
from eating 30 dollar sandwitches when ever i wanted, to barely getting one meal-a-day
i try workin my ass off everyday, have blood oozin out, just look at my relentless-skin
if i had to live my whole life like this, no nice house, nice car, forget about expensive-rims
i shoud of never picked on kids for being poor, i was rich never giving concideration-to-lend
now look at it, i dont even have blankets to sleep in, im in a worse situation-then-them
im getting through it fine, just realizing what happend but im still cool-and-sure
that everything will be back in place, and my parents will be walking through-the-door
ooo-im-soar, but i gotta get back on the block, im hungry and i have a thrist-attraction
i was wearing 90 dollar shirts, now im wearin grocery bags, that definatly the worst-of-fashions
i could of made the best of my actions, gotta admit it, i wont get as far as a street scholar-will
im pulling in a couple of cents everyday, now just working my way up to dollar-bills
tought me a lesson, quit relying on people to support me, i better learn the game-and-fast
cant get some of my needs, none of the wants, let things be the same-at-last
they walk in the door, had to show me how hard life really was, i wouldnt of sought-impressions
now i realize how good i had it, and i know this experience has tought-a-lesson

the good life? i took advantage of it, but my consiquence is more-then-mild
from livin as a rich kid, now my old friends see me as a orphaned-child
they wanted to challenge-me-heck! now since it happened my personalitys-wrecked
i had to change my life, its the survival of the fittest, a reality-check

ON TOPIC--tie
FLOW--Vokals (those inner rhyme schemes with them ill ass multis and easy structure was too obvious as the winner)
MULTIS- Vokals (Ell had some nice multis, but Vokals came more complex with more of the same mulits incorporated in a line not to mention the whole bar)
VOCAB- tie
ORIGINALITY- tie
IMAGERY-tie
DEPTH- Vokals (will quote some lines to show you what I mean)
WORDPLAY- tie
METAPHORS- tie
HOOK ORIGINALITY- blah....both had the typical cut of a verse type of hook...nothing impressing


My throat glands crushed from squeezes sexually abused on my knees to please '–
Please believe it I’m ready to leave this I’m ready to street it, I’m ready I need it-

Finally awake to the wake of the quiet raped by the silence

What did I do to deserve this, all taken away from me quicker than what a New York city purse is-



i was wearing 90 dollar shirts, now im wearin grocery bags, that definatly the worst-of-fashions

shoud of never picked on kids for being poor, i was rich never giving concideration-to-lend
now look at it, i dont even have blankets to sleep in, im in a worse situation-then-them



^^I had just had to quote those....STANDOUT......Anywayz, This battle was even in some categories except for flow, and Vokals came with deeper into the issue I think whereas Ell stayed on topic but never really penetrated the story line.

My Vote- Vokals

ON TOPIC - Both of you did very well on this..more so Ell, but I still think in this area, it was a tie...
FLOW- Ell...kids multis were tight as shit, and used all in the right spot..
MULTIS - Same as above..multis create a good flow..especially ones that are used well..
VOCAB- Vokals..I dont think vocab is big, but if you have the right words..in the right spot..then it works
ORIGINALITY - Vokals got this..Ell picked the hood..which is quite common I guess..
IMAGERY - Vokals again but basically the thing that caught me was the kid pryin at the can, that shit was good..
DEPTH - Ell..He gave every little detail, how this kid was gettin money..what he needed it for..how he was gettin some cereal and shit..I unno..I felt he got this..
WORDPLAY - Ell..both had some..but no real standouts..
METAPHORS - Same as above..Tie tho..
HOOK ORIGINALITY- Kat said it best..both were basic..

Vote Ell..

I jus was feelin his verse more, I could get into more..
I think Vok used too many misused multis, therefore it wasnt
really a smooth read..

:)..Good bout boys..

ON TOPIC tie- I got to say that in this categorie yall both stayed on topic very well there was no lines that made you veer off topic so good job in that aspect.

FLOW- Vokals- I got to give this categorie to voks because his flowed was just a little more consistent and deeper than ell dawgs was by a little bit.

MULTIS-elldawg-Both of you guys had multies but ell dawgs verse just seemed to be overwhelmed with multis to me.

VOCAB-tie

ORIGINALITY-vokals-Voks verse was more original to me because it had a very interesting spin on the topic elldawgs just seemed a little simple

IMAGERY-tie

DEPTH-Voks-like I said previously he took you deeper into the whole experince and it hooked you on reading the verse.

WORDPLAY-both

METAPHORS-both

HOOK ORIGINALITY-both hooks was good to me

Vote- Vokals both had good verses but i just think voks was a little deeper

ON TOPIC--tie
FLOW--EllDawg..Vokals was flowin nice.Just forced in some lines..
MULTIS- Vokals,Ells was nice too but vokals was just 70% multis.
VOCAB- VOkals..He incorperated some wide words into his multis..ell was simple but nice
ORIGINALITY- tie
IMAGERY-tie
DEPTH- Vokals-His shit touched deeper cause of the child molestation shit and then the parents actually comin back
WORDPLAY- tie(anit see none)
METAPHORS- tie(where?)
HOOK ORIGINALITY-Vokals-Ells seemed forced and dident match up.

Overall this was a very good battle.Should be a tie but vokals just got by..not by much.But a win is a win..His stuff just flowed more fluiedly and the hook was a nice setup..and not just a requirment like it was in ell's.Ells however was very well writtin and i like the style.Shit was maad nice wit the refrences to the good life..but vokals was just more of a "topical" like piece..if that makes any sence.

vote=vokals

ON TOPIC - Tie
FLOW - Ell...Multis were hittin and keeping the flow going
MULTIS - Same as above..
VOCAB - Vokals...
ORIGINALITY - Vokals...
IMAGERY - Vokals again but basically the thing that caught me was the kid pryin at the can, that shit was good..
DEPTH - Vokals... I was feeling the emotion in his alot more.
WORDPLAY - Ell...
METAPHORS - Ell...
HOOK ORIGINALITY - Tie... Like they said, both were pretty basic.

Nice verses from both sides. This was a harder battle to vote on, but a decision did have to be made. I would spend some time to pick out favorite quotes from both verses but I'm too tired for that. I felt that Vokals did come more with the catagories that matter in a topical. So on that, I'm going to have to...

...Vote - Vokals.

Vokals wins by TKO 4-1 & will advance to the second to face the winner of NYC SPITZ/Tw!sted Topical.


Great job Ell, I under-estimated your topical skills.