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16-18 BARS
FIRST TO 5 (4-1 TKO...3-0 KO)
VOTE ON:
ON TOPIC
DEPTH
IMAGERY
ORIGINALITY
FLOW
MULTIS
VOCAB

PARTICIPATING MEMBERS & MEMBERS WHO WERE INVOLVED CAN VOTE. ALSO VETS CAN VOTE. EACH MEMBER MUST VOTE ON ONE (1) BATTLE!!!

TOPIC: ON DEATH ROW & YOUR PUT TO DEATH THE NEXT DAY. WHAT ARE YOUR FINAL THOUGHTS, YOUR FINAL MEAL & YOUR LAST REQUEST BEFORE YOUR DEATH. ARE YOU GUILTY FOR WHAT YOU DID?

GOOD LUCK

Check.....

In..............

You know this shit's really getting ironic. First I get a topic about being in court, then I get a topic about being in jail. What's really ironic about it, is the reason I'm staying in this tourny is to help raise the money to get my brother out of jail.


save it for somewhere else..dont clutter

thanks

I lay here restless and cold, night after night, with tears in my eyes.
As death grows near I ask why and you can hear the fear in my cries.
Adhere to my lies. Heartless and cold is how I appear to the guys.
Inside I’m scared and alone as I feel death becomes near, end of the line.
Nineteen on death row, wishing for one more day before I must let go.
A good-hearted man lead to murder in a way that only Mac Beth knows.
Take a breath bro, I tell myself, everything will be alright in the end.
But it won’t and I know this, it’s just pretend. I’m in need of a friend.
It wasn’t my fault, I yell. My fist hits the wall and it doesn’t stop.
A dozen chops trying to reach freedom but the wall doesn’t drop.
A dozen cops rush in and try to grab me but it won’t be that easy.
If I’m going out, I’m going out fighting or until death frees me.
Fists are flying, tears are drying, anger takes over my fear of dieing.
No longer crying, sighing, I know it’s of no use but I continue trying.
I hit the floor on my back and catch a knee to the ribs with a crack.
The chances were stacked. I see the baton coming and feel the impact.
I wake up naked on the cold floor, my body is shaking involuntary.
The cloud in my head clears as my eyes adjust. I’m in solitary.
My body so bruised it takes five minutes to get myself off the floor.
I get up and fall to the door, land on the bunk and let the tears pour.
Visions of freedom in my dreams, I was once happy, or so it seemed.
Then I see that night replaying and I’m awoke by the screams.
The day goes by in a daze. No longer sure of where or even who I am.
I’ve accepted that in an hour I’ll be dead and I don’t give a damn.
What’s worse than cruel and unusual? Cruel and usual wins by far.
They do this everyday. Death for a death and I’m the one with no heart.
A million thoughts passing through my mind in less than a second.
Thinking about how this happened and how in death I can learn a lesson.
My thoughts are interrupted by the Warden calling me for my last meal.
How can I eat when I’ll be dead right after? How am I supposed to deal?
But I eat for the purpose of extending my time if only for a short while.
Then I stand to take deaths walk down the hall of the last mile.

*Cerberus - is a 3 headed dog from hell.

Dear Niecy daddy loves you but it’ll be a while before you next see me/
I know mommy left weeping and police zoomed me away vexed screaming//
Trapping you inside intense dreaming and you haven’t been heard since speaking/
And in seeping? It’s more than sheets staining; it’s my baby wailing while it drips leaking…//
Out to presses baby don’t believe the message, Daddy’s no monster but he was reckless/
It shocked us both breathless I never saw that side staring at my own cracked reflection//
Steadily clenching my teeth on the brush bristles as the guard whistles I’m still venting/
And he still mentions “time for breakfast” but I only hunger for your hearts attention//
Your arms acceptance while shards of pencils scrape and draw my tears in letters/
Words that bear a measure of pain beyond explain, yet I try to share it better//
But it’s clear the pressure scarred and wrecked her, only four years and she saw the stretcher/
Used to preach on and lecture now I’m the devil who sicked *Cerberus on to fetch her//
His teeth made her arm and neck hurt, wait… I’m twisted mistaking mother for daughter/
Still both suffered the slaughter when I saw her, drew blades, and doubly crossed her//
Suitably tossed her into the same heap of trash where I probably got her and dropped her/
Horribly postured cause her love came head over heels the same way I honestly lost her//

Dishonestly doctors calm nerves of my girl and watch her watching me as cops swerve/
Right’s and locks served over wrists so I’m tasting bricks just praying the clock turns//
But lost turns don’t come back they vanish with chances like judgmental quick glances/
I didn’t plan it, it’s only pure passion when true romance is expressed in death dances//

In deep trances I’m contorting my soul filling the bars with wrenched hand scripts/
Sulking in drenched damage over so many wet pages of one immense bandage//
Hoping that it wraps it in a way that Niecy understands it, my time is fleeting/
And still she needs me on this planet but I’m banished with my eyes receding//
On every breath I’m breathing seeing the one that completes me destroying me cheating/
Decoying me even while he runs out the door for the plot employing my sneakers//
Then she drops embroiling my features in future sketches of the most ruthless wreckers/
But truthful confessors non-apologetic let through detective’s “type abusive” checklist//
Infected with green complexes so perplexing no Harvard lawyer could even contest it/
Now I accept it to proud to regret it I just want my baby get what’s finally my message//
That last request is that Niecy get this letter at 8 when she’s old enough to do more than just hate/
True love it comes late, and sometimes it just breaks, but my last meal is in heaven where our love waits//

(Sorry about the lateness I had Drill today, it was only for one day)

ON TOPIC: Both
DEPTH: Both - Sadistyk edged it
IMAGERY: Sadistyk
ORIGINALITY: T1Oracle
FLOW: Both
MULTIS: Both - T1 edged it
VOCAB: T1Oracle

Critique:
Both verses were illness in their own respects. Both participants stayed on topic and delivered extraordinary verses as a result. When it came to the depth of the piece I felt that both came nicely but Sadistyk had so much emotion in the verse that its hard to ignore. The imagery, though, has to go to Sadistyk. I felt his verse. Though I was never on death row, it completely put me in that state of mind and even reminded my of my situations. On the topic of originality, I gave this to Oracle. Reason being, look at the angle he's writing from. Anyone can write about their situation and how it affects them directly, but I felt that Oracle dropped a piece where he took the child's feelings into consideration. That right there is what gave him originality. The "flow" and the multis worked hand-in-hand in this round with these two. Both showed me a very nice structure to work with and the multis that complemented (yeah, its spelled correctly) it perfectly. If I had to pick one person who excelled there, it would be Oracle - but very slightly. In terms of vocabulary, Oracle showed more of an extensive one. With all things considered..

Vote: T1Oracle

Topics versers hit hard expressions nice imagry loved that to the fullest with the conception pertaining to the artitsts definging story line love once agian obviously someone dropped harder in this case Oracle would be my choice because of the outside prespective placed into a solo letter a depper diminsion then sadistik even though the stroy line in your cpativated sensory with self imposed imagry fellin the tears through out the entire fight man thats love both got off no question just Vote Oracle

ON TOPIC-Both
DEPTH-ORACLE
IMAGERY-SADISTYK
ORIGINALITY-ORACLE
FLOW-Both
MULTIS-Both
VOCAB-ORACLE

Critique: I feel that this battle was nicely paired...Jay came nicely with his verse the emotion and depth behind it screamed out to the reader and grabbed u deeper into th piece....Oracle came nicely too making this a very close battle....the reason oracles piece was so good ,besides the obvios was becuase he took his daughter's feelings and embellished on them within the piece....the emotion and depth within that itself was enough to put him over the edge in the depth dept. this was a very close battle and i enjoyed reading both verses...but i am going to have to go with Oracel on this one....i still love u jay:( i hope u dont bitch at me like OTHER PPL......)

MY VOTE: ORACLE...

^^Lol... Nah I'm not mad. I knew I was gonna lose anyway. I didn't start this until Friday night. I had forgot about it and lost track of my days.

ON TOPIC: Both
DEPTH: Both - Sadistyk edged it
IMAGERY: Sadistyk
ORIGINALITY: T1Oracle
FLOW: Both
MULTIS: Both - T1 edged it
VOCAB: T1Oracle

Critique: Both verses were totally on pont in all aspects the flows of both were ill, in which it made the reader get a real feel for the situation..........
sad took the normal straight on route and worked some magic with it with all the feelins and had the effect of makin you totally feel like you were there.........
t1 took a whole different approached which seemed more creative, he made you feel the whole realm of effects on everybody, his vocab wasnt to much but extensive enough for this piece....................
in my opinion both did what it was thye did and made me feel the whole death row thing...........but the creativity that T1 displayed played an important part...........
T1 gets my vote.........but barely ill shit ta both

Congrats Oracle, good battle.

Thank you, and thanks to all who voted. Now the pressure turns up yet another notch...