Rules:
3-0 KO, 4-1 TKO, 1st to 5 Or Whoever Has The Most Votes By End Of Voting Period. Mods Will Discuss Tie Breaker.
NO Hate Votes, DR/CR Votes, Swaying, Feeding, Biting, Recycling Like Vex, No Beef Or Freeposting In Threads.
Vote On A MINIMUM Of 2 Battles.
40 Lines Max, Hook & Dialogue Not Included Against Line Limit

Deadlines Are Midnight EST, 0-2 Hours Over = Free Bee. 2-12 Hours Over = 1 Docked Vote. 12-24 Hours = 2 Docked Votes. Anything Over 24 Hours Is DQ. Some Don' Like This Rule. Well Tough Shit, Don't Procrastinate & If You Show Up On Time Then You Won't Lose Votes.
Extensions Will Be Granted Under Extreme Circumstances As Long As You Let Us Know In Time. The Day Before & Day Of Won't Cut It.

Voting Will Be As Follows: EXPLAINED
On Topic:
Depth:
Imagery:
Originality:
Flow:
Multis:
Enjoyment:
Vocab:

Overall:

Topic: You are kidnapped by a small group of Palestinian terrorists who believe you are an Israeli spy whilst on holiday there.
How do you communicate with them, and what happens?

Check In By: Friday 10th March
Verses Due: Sunday 12th March

Checkin...

G'luck Bladed

g/l...

lol @ topic...

While Walking Into A Mosque, An Obviously Foreign Man Is Assaulted & Thrown Into A Nearby Van...

The Van Drives In Circles Throughout The Maze-Like Streets Before Heading Out Of The Town Along A Dirt Road Into The Desert...

It Arrives At A Small Secluded Structure, Formerly A House, Now A Skeleton Of A Building...

They Drag The Captive Inside & Throw Him On The Floor...

.

.

.

On My Knees, But No Pleading Is Leaving My Swollen Lips
Not Flinching From The Fists Or The Stick Of Thick Sudden Spit
Its An Oven, Shit, The Heat Beats Me Down In Submission
Numb Sittin With Battered Fingers, Can Feel My Thumb Twitchin
Ignoring Their Dumb Bitchin As They Hammered My Knuckles
Blinding Pain, Somehow They Know My Name, I Stammer In Trouble
Haunting Echo! Shit, My Real Name Not Some Mossad Facade
Feeling Steel, Reeling: Did She Survive? Give That Job To God

.

In Walks Their Leader... His Eyes Fall On My Broken Form...

A Smile Forms...

.

A Continued "UpKeep" Of The "Down Beat" On Facial Features
No More Pain, Tour Changed As My Vision Goes Spacial - Weaker
Voices Turn To Murmurs As They Ask "Where's Your Yahweh Now?"
Eyes Flutter, Thinking Back On The Her & Me, When Jobs Stayed Sound
No Chance Of A Fuck Up & No Possibility Of Us Being Captured
A Reversed Beretta To The Face: Im The "Butt Of This Joke," Believe The Laughter
They've Killed Worse, Blood Runs Across Tongue & Spills Forth
Boss Says "Chill, Sport" As Breathing Increases, Said With Shrill Force

.

Their Leader Stoops In Front Of Me & Throws Some Papers In My Face...

"Goddamn CIA," He Mutters...

"Can't Keep Out Of Israeli & Palestinian Business"...

Looking Over His Shoulder At The Nearest Hamas Man, He Speaks...

"Kill Him"

.

They Know: My Mossad Cover Blown, Fellow Agent/Wife Surely Gone
My Good Night? I Should Fight & End My Decrepid Life's Hurried Song
Then From The Shadows Came Her Laugh, Familiar & So Intimate
That Look Of Heavenly Gates & Angelic - Faith Hasn't Forgiven Yet
People Say Once In Heaven Any Earthy Thought Will Then Subside
If That's True: I Violated This Place Cuz I'd Kill Given One Try
Put Finger's Around Her Thin & Gorgeous Neck Of Smooth Lines
She Doubts My Strength? I Put A Finger On Her Lips: "Dear, Yes & Goodbye"

.

As Eyes Turn Teary, Totally Dreary From The Beating I'd Get...

I Know Without Her, No Matter The Betrayal, My Life Isn't Worth Shit...

.

The Workings Of "Above The Counter"-Terrorism Was Boring Me
Simply Interrogating Patient Victims: Submittin To Superiority
The System That Quickened The Arrival Of Sanctioned Death
Gave Me Great Freedom As A State's Demon, Voters Thanked Them Next
All Knowledge Of My Existence, A Pitance, Was Erased Correct
Face Abreast To Shoulder Blade! All For Over Pay! Disgraced In Death
James Bond? Johnny English? Both Meaningless! I Raced The Best
An Image Burned To My Eyes As I Died? Her Figure In A Lacing Dress

.

"Two Undisclosed CIA Operatives & Exchange Agents With Israel Mossad Agency Disappeared Two Weeks Ago As They Searched The Palestinian Area Of The Gaza Strip For Signs Of Terrorist Activity"

"The United States Hasn't Released Much Information At This Time Concerning The Disappearance But They Say They Are Considering Defection"

.

Dangerous Work
Me
Malik
Narrator




Walking through streets that twist and turn for days
Admist a Country that had burned for war and praise
Mosques filled with locals attending the daily service
Ears filled with voices and my stomach is gettin nervous
Terrorism stench is filling the air as it enters my nostril
Heart beatin faster I look around and it feels too hostile
Entered a small shack just tryin to get some directions
All eyes on me like they knew I was a bum with connections
The lady looked and asked how she could be of assistance
The glare in her eye striked me and I could see persistence
I asked her if she knew where the closest bus stop was
Angrly she said NO and for a second everything felt like a pause
Quickly I exit but notice a guy whispering on a cell phone
Like sumpin was known, look outside and the hotels blown
Another explosin rocks the battered and cracked roads
At that exact second a car is intact before it explodes
Runnin down the street and I abruptly turn the corner
Chin kisses the butt of an AK, "You gonna die foreigner!"
*Doors slam shut on a beat down brown family sedan*
*Speadin in the car while they work on a devious plan*


Malik:
Now that we kidnapped the spy where are we taking him?

Abraham:
We're going to abandonned warehouse where HAMAS has been working on biological chemicals. The only way to get the spy to talk is by torture. With the attacks that were just carried out, security should be occupied for a while. Atleast long enough to do what we gotta do.

Malik:
What about Saqr? Has anyone spoke to him about the attacks planned?

Abraham:
Not that I know of. Our main concearn right now is making sure we obtain the information about the bombings from the spy.

*Car screeches infront of the warehouse*

Abraham:
Malik grab the spy and take him down to bottom floor. Tie him up and make sure you put fear into him. I'm gonna try and get ahold of Saqr and see how his progress is coming.

Malik:
Just make sure we stick to our blueprint....

Abraham:
Don't worry about me, worry about your job at hand...

*Abraham calls Saqr but isint able to get a hold of him*


Eyes slowly open while my body is suffering pain and shock
Thoughts of fear rush my brain, I can hear the clock tick and tock
Scanning the room I notice a man with bandanas coverin his face
Tryin to retrace my steps and figure out how I ended up in this place
Another man appears and states I have the answers they need
He cuts my flesh and asks for me to obey and not mislead
Proceeds to ask what I knew about the recent hotel attacks
"I think they were Israeli rebels equipped with bombs in backpacks"
Kicks me to the ground and begins to cut off my left ear
Places the ear of my chest while I'm scared to death with fear

*Abraham's Cell Phone Rings*

Abraham:
Hello?

Saqr:
Abraham it's me. There has been a sudden change of plans where are you at?

Abraham:
We're taking care of the spy and trying to finish getting the information. What is going on?

Saqr:
We're going to up the attacks to today! We are gonna rush suicide bombers in a hotel occupied by Isrealis. Along with the bombers I am gonna send in Abdulla and the spy.

Abraham:
But we haven't gotten all the information from the spy! How can we just send him in?!

Saqr:
Don't worry about that. I already collected something that he dropped at the "shack"....

Abraham picks me up and wraps guaze around my head
Ear still bleeding and I had a feeling about what was said
I remembered I left my briefcase when I ran from the shack
He then explains to me I must carry out a terrorist attack
Thrown in a car and I'm rushed to the suicidal destination
Strapped with bombs, Abdullah drivin to the homicidal location
Car crashes through road blocks, he's thrown out the windshield
The car started on fire and everyones eyes stayed peeled
Quickly I fled the scene but there were eyes all around
Shot fired and suddenly the angel of death made his rounds

I'll vote on this when I get back from work

On Topic: Arminius.... He told it more from the "tourist point of view" Maybe I read it wrong, but Bladed's character seemed to actually BE a CIA agent.

Depth: Both did a very good job with this. Arminius seemed to be the more realistic as far as the whole "Tourist" thing goes... But Bladed also depicted the characters feeling and thoughts beautifully.

Imagery: Bladed came solid throughout. Arminius brought it strong with the first verse, but then I felt it sorta fell off a little... Guess it IS kinda tough tho, when ya have a line limit... so I understand that.

Originality: Meh, neither was really anything overly original IMO. Interesting, yes, but not original... Guess it's kinda hard to do with a topic so specific tho, so good job on both parts.

Flow:Bladed. Both had consistent lines, nothing too stretched or choppy really, so props on that... But The internal rhymes of Bladed's verse really helped move it along.

Multis: Bladed. More complex multis. Self-explainatory.

Enjoyment: Close, but this goes to Bladed as well... I think all the extra dialouge took away a little bit in Arminius'.

Vocab: It seems to be a trend with this guy... But I think Bladed took vocab too. Seems he puts a lot of thought into using out-of-the-ordinary words. It really helps his verse.

Overall: Nice battle, both of you... As I already said, originality was a toughie considering how specific the topic was, but ya both did a good job with what ya were given. Neither was really a bad verse, but I do think that Bladed edged this one a bit...

Stay up, guys... Can't wait to see more.


*edited to make easier to read*

uppin

On Topic: Tie - From what I understood of Bladed's, I think the terrorists believed he was an Israeli spy at first, but then realised he was a CIA agent. If not, then this should go to Arminius, who was on topic without a problem
Depth: Tie - Both went into sufficient detail and set the scene well, then went on to explain the situation with a high level of skill
Imagery: Bladed - Close one this, but I felt Bladed was just more consistent with the vivid imagery. Arm had some nice imagery, but it was in parts.
Originality: Tie - Topic was a bit too specific for any major originality. Bladed bought a nice twist with the CIA agent thing and Arm had a really creative ending with the suicide mission
Flow: Tie - Both were stretched at times. Bladed had some nice inner rhymes, but the syllable count got a bit high even with that said. Arm's was pretty solid, just fell off at some parts
Multis: Bladed - Very strong with the multis, helped to aid his flow which was suffering at times with his vocab choice. Arm had quite a few, but they were a bit too basic compared to Bladed's
Enjoyment: Arminius - I enjoyed Arm's verse more. Reading Bladed's was a bit start/stop, where I'd have to pause in between and re-read a particular line to fully comprehend what he was trying to say. Arm's was easy to read, engaging and the ending was very entertaining
Vocab: Bladed - Excellent vocab used. Arm's was rather basic

Both cats dropped nice verses. Bladed had the lyrically superior verse, whereas Arm focused on the storytelling side. I usually tend to favour the participant who tells the story better, but in this case, I felt Bladed was a bit too strong on the lyrical side to warrant a win for Arminius.

Vote - Bladed Thesis

On Topic: Arminius, Bladed did seem to actually be the CIA agent
Depth: Tie. It was pretty close to me. I thought you both went into detail pretty well, I could get into both.
Imagery: Bladed .... He took this b/c I could constantly picture his story. Arminius did good but just not as much of it.
Originality:Tie. Both took different approaches.
Flow: tie. I really thought Bladed had stretched lines. And Armininus flow wasnt overly consistant either
Multis: Bladed.... read his drop
Enjoyment: tie.. It's hard to decide which is more enjoyable, bc i really liked the topic.
Vocab: Tie. I don't feel either one stood out over the other

overall: good battle but Bladed Thesis .

Thoughts: Bladed is someone to watch out for next round I guess!

Read this the other day..just havent had time to vote on it!!

On Topic: Arminius
Depth: Tie
Imagery: Bladed
Originality:Tie
Flow: Arminius
Multis: Bladed, a shit load like usual
Enjoyment: Bladed, was feelin his aproach n story matter
Vocab: Tie

Vote: Bladed...

Reason: Overall was a closer battle then suggested, bladed just has nice word choice as usual n always seems to tell a really in depth, creative story..arm held his own which isnt suprising cuz he's n ill writer...overall good battle lads..pz