*ANY MAJOR PROBLEMS CONTACT A MOD*
NO FREE-POSTING
NO SWAYING VOTES
SHIT TALKING GOES IN DESIGNATED THREAD


LINE LIMIT - 40 LINES MAX



HOOK CAN BE INCLUDED DOESN'T COUNT AGAINST YOU. aS WELL AS DIALOGUE. JUST DONT MAKE IT EXCESSIVE.
FIRST TO 5 (4-1 TKO...3-0 KO)
VOTE ON:
ON TOPIC
DEPTH
IMAGERY
ORIGINALITY
FLOW
MULTIS
VOCAB


PARTICIPATING MEMBERS & MEMBERS WHO WERE INVOLVED CAN VOTE. ALSO VETS CAN VOTE. EACH MEMBER MUST VOTE ON TWO (2) BATTLES!!!



CHECK IN BY SATURDAY, MAR. 17 AT MIDNIGHT EST
VERSES DUE TUESDAY, MAR. 20 AT MIDNIGHT EST
VOTING ENDS SUNDAY, MAR. 25 AT MIDNIGHT EST
IF YOU SHOW UP LATE AND POST UNDER 24 HOURS AFTER THE DEADLINE = 1 DOCKED VOTE
IF BOTH TEXTCEES ARE LATE, THIS RULE DOES NOT APPLY.
ANYTHING OVER 24 = NO SHOW


TOPIC - "Casted Shadows Of The Gods"

check check

Untouchable J is DQ'd. A.J. Hustler will take his place. The verse deadline is extended until:

THURSDAY, MAR. 22 AT MIDNIGHT EST

gotchya, sounds good...

...During old ages, long long past, the many pantheons of gods had collided in an all out war. Alliances were made, some pantheons stayed neutral, and others tried to stay out of the conflict altogether until the right time. Each pantheon had their territories and human slaves, but none were satisfied, and desired more power of others, and so began the wars between pantheons...

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Facing wars, stored on planes between heaven & hell
They're breaking lords, Thor restrained on a bed in a cell
Son of Odin, Vidar, starts searching the stars
Norse teamed up with romans so he's working with Mars
Far from them, in a dungeon, Thor's tortured by Helios
Then by Bel, the two compete to see who he'd tell the most
Beaten brutally, views are focused onto a room with Juno
Chained to walls, needs to stall them filling a tomb with Pluto
News goes through the channels, from reptiles to mammals
The war escalates into what neither side can handle
A clash of the titans is something it had to be
With two huge armies fighting throughout the galaxies...

...To The Deep Blue...

The gods of the seas fought for the waters of Earth
Turning to oceans of blood as they slaughter for turf
Tidal waves & sharks, islands break apart
Trout battling salmon, bass lakes with carp

...The Darkness Below...

And in the depths of the planet, Janus opened the gates
Hel descended and she began choking out Hades
Janus tackled by Shiva, who's distracted by Krishna
Then hammered down to the ground by the Slavic Gabia

...High In The Sky...

In the air, Venus battles Hera who caught Nott
Who got shot during a fierce fight with Arianrhod
Dewi, god of the dragons goes bizerk on Modi
Loki falling for the pranks and tricks of the Coyote
Thunder strikes, Zeus comes on a cloud and takes hold
Of Jupiter's neck, tight enough to break gold
Hercules and Mercury share stares through theirs fibers
Dagur comes flying through on his chariots of fire

Things seemed to be going well for the humans slaves of the several pantheons. God-heads were slowly killing eachother off, until something crucial happened....

All sharing desires to be the rulers of the universe
Animals forced to drag bodies through the dirt & sand
Things were out of hand, the war was out of proportions
Egyptians had enough, in came a crowd around Horus
Ra & Osiris, Hathor but no Isis
Ra opens his mouth and the rest remain silent
Other pantheons overwhelmed by the power in numbers
Able to manifest more powerful wonders
Decided to stand up & divided to lands
Many gods come to meet amongst the egyptian sands
Agreed on a decree to evenly split the peasants
Humanity controlled from the far past to the present...



***site of reference and research - http://www.lowchensaustralia.com/names/gods.htm there you can get all the links i went to for all the different names I used...

imma try to drop..

Try harder . . .

lol... i'll have it before 12:00

:( Kinda been busy... here it goes

Following the shadows casted by gods through the afterlife, determines a warriors true fate,,,

Warriors in line, blocking arrows and swords the struggle proceeds...
Death interviens, a combatant stabbed in the spleen dabs to his knees...
Battered he bleeds, and falls back- stuck to the heart with a final strike...
Looking to the mild light, his body feels cold and weak, kind of tight...
His blood stains the land, as his sword he carrys drops from his hand...
His soul enters a circle of paths, where each path is blocked by a man...

Where am I?

-Upon death a young warrior of combat is stuck in purgatory-
-Each warrior has a path, and must follow the path casted by gods-
-In order to this, he must follow his warrior instincts to find the path the gods have choosen for him-

The blood still drips from his body, the wounds open and leaking...
His soul laying down, with it's arms reaching, it regians it's feeting...
What an unusual feeling- a spectre, yet in death he stands in shock...
What path does he plan to walk? He's unsure for each path is blocked...

-In life-

He fought hard, was loyal to his king- Would give his life for victory...
Man of little words, mostly mystery, but knew every gods history...
In war he fought with the heart of a lion, and the speed of a steed...
He never knew greed, for biting the hand that feeds he didn't belive...
Never dwelled on what he got, no matter the amount that he gave...
With that he was never afraid, the gods open the path of the brave...

-He enters the path of the brave. To find happiness in this path the warrior must rely on sense-
-Everything he was tought will now rely on finding hints or casted shadows from the gods-

The path is narrow and dark, but the ground has a faded glow...
As he sees no signs he feels, is this where the frustrated go?
Walking a few steps, he drops to the dirt, and fingers a hole...
He hears the cry of a hawk, on the branch above lingers a crow...
The warrior walks up, and abruptly stops at a fork in the path...
To the left is a hanging branch, and behind is damp and tall grass...
To his right he hears wolves, but the path is clear to his sight...
Ahead of him, he sees a wounded sparrow, struggling to fight...
The warrior wants to help, but the sounds to right grow heavy...
The warrior walks to right, tensing up, his fists closed ready...
He holds steady, to the left- he sees a sword and a sheild...
He moves the brush, and grabs them eagerly, ready to yeild...

Is This It?

Thew warrior walks into the dark, a wolf lunges with hate...
A scratch to his face, but the wolf is slumped in his place...
The blood drips from the sword, as the warrior rips it out...
A warcry echos the dark damp woods, as he lifts his mouth...
He begins to walk, he holds his sheild high to fend himself...
He looks on down the trail that he thinks pends his wealth...
Coming close to the end, he's deceived by layers of trees...
He turns around looks at the wolves that he see...
somehow the warriors- at ease!

-The gods casted no shadows for the warrior in the afterlife that day-
-It had been the warriors whole life to fight and be brave, the gods gift to him was simply this-
Young warrior who has fought for survival most of his life would not be led in any other direction, then to keep on fighting.

This is fate!

Yurluzn is docked one vote.

This needs votes . . .

I Need Votes.

The quality of both drops were on par with each other, but for creativity (not that Yurluzn didnt have any) I gotta give it to AJ Hustler! That was a pretty tight piece, conceptually...and you did a lot of good research on the names of different deities and gods from different religions and cultures. I will say though, that you dropped a few too many names at times, to where it got confusing...but overall it contributed to the twist at the end. It's a good way of explaining why the world's religions are so different, yet so similar...I guess?

On Topic - Close...but gotta give it to AJ.

Depth - As far as depth of the piece goes, not depth of the topic, I'll give this one to Yurluzn since his drop had a central character.

Imagery - Yurluzn definitely put more detail into his imagery, surroundings and what not...but that was more fitting for his drop. AJ had the luxury of talking about gods battling, so there's a lot of personal images there already. I'd say this was a tie.

Originality - AJ Hustler.

Flow - Hmm...this is tough. Even though I'm voting for AJ overall, I think Yurluzn edged him on this. AJ dropped too many names at one point.

Multis - Neither had any really... not any that stood out.

Vocab - Tie.

imagery: AJ
depth: yurluzn
flow: tie
multies: yurluzn
on topic: both
vocab: yurluzn slightly

vote: yurluzn

Rationale: AJ I know you can come better than that, while I liked the approach you took to the topic, incorporating all the different Gods of many religions, you made some careless errors i.e. Zeus choking Jupiter, when in fact Zeus and Jupiter are the same person, just the greek and roman versions, without these fualts your verse would've been better, however yurluzn had enough depth to take this, good one

ON TOPIC - Tie - Neither detracted far from the topic, but both had unique ways to tell their story. Can't really give this either way as both did what was required

DEPTH - Yurluzn - Felt he went into much more depth with his character, describing deep emotions as well as the reality he faced. AJ went for the much more direct descriptive angle, where he basically described what was going on in the battle, rather than getting in depth emotion or focus on one or a couple in particular

IMAGERY - AJ Hustler - Much more vivid imagery in his piece. Yurluzn had some dope imagery as well, but I felt that he focused a lot more on emotion than imagery. Towards the end was much better imagery wise, but for me, AJ was consistent with the imagery throughout

ORIGINALITY - AJ Hustler - Tough one, but I gave this to AJ simply for the research and knowledge shown in creating a very impressive image of a battle between the gods. It wasn't just name dropping, he actually knew what each god's role was and their characteristics. Yurluzn didnt really hit me with anything majorly original.

FLOW - Yurluzn - I was going to give this to AJ, but I felt that when reading AJ's piece, the flow was choppy when it came to unfamiliar god's and their pronunciation. This was most apparant when the name of a god was at the end of a line, which made me pause on the next line to see if they both flowed together. Example of this was Gates - Hades - Krishna - Gabia. None of those rhymed for me, and made me pause. Yurluzn had 1 or 2 stretched lines, but was far more consistent throughout his verse.

MULTIS - Tie - Both had some very dodgy multis at times, and at other times, some decent multis. Neither was really consistent throughout though, which means I can't really give this either way

VOCAB - Tie - Both had steady and relevant use of vocab, with nothing really spectacular or over the top. Yurluzn, proof read your piece before posting lol. "He moves the brush" and "Thew warrior" are a couple of examples.

Overall - Tie - Couldn't really pick out a winner. For me, Yurluzn showed the better lyrical aspects out of the two, and AJ had the more "outside the box, looking in" aspect of storytelling and imagery. Just think that both pieces lacked a certain edge, where something dramatic or jaw dropping happens at the end. They both seem to end abruptly, with little or no after effects of the story being told.

Nice battle though fellas

oh shit lol 2-2

oh shit lol 2-2


*3-2 Dubz

no i got 3 aj got 2 look again... i was docked

i know what you saying nyc, i know they are the same, i just thought i'd seperate the 2 for this piece...and ya, i was afraid i had made it a lil too confusing when it was dun, but owell...

and it's 2-1 me with yurluzn's docked vote....

It's 2-2

On Topic - Tie...
Vocabulary - A.J. ...
Originality - A.J. ...
Flow - Yurluzn...
Multies - Yurluzn...
Imagery - Yurluzn...
Depth - A.J. ...

Thoughts To Both...

A.J. - I Liked The Concept You Chose, I Wasn't Expecting That Outlook On It When I Made The Topic. You Had A Good Verse, But In It All Some Parts Were Choppy And The Wording Was A Bit Off...

Yurluzn - I Was Hoping To Get More Out Of The Topic From You, But Your Verse Wasn't Bad At All. Good Flow And Imagery, But Lacked The Detailed Depth To The Story...

Vote - Tie... Both Were Good But Neither Were Enough IMO...

3-3..

zu... vote man... I see you I know u wanna.

It's 3-2 to AJ with the docked vote. If you take Spitz's vote for Yurluzn away due to the docked vote, he only has 2 votes from the 2 ties me and Flat Line gave. The other dude voted for AJ

yeah so lets get votes... lol

It's 3-2 to AJ with the docked vote. If you take Spitz's vote for Yurluzn away due to the docked vote, he only has 2 votes from the 2 ties me and Flat Line gave. The other dude voted for AJ


Word . . . 3-2. I'll vote in 30 min.

pfft... cmon zu

ON TOPIC: Both
DEPTH: Yurluzn
IMAGERY: Tie
ORIGINALITY: A.J.
FLOW: Yurluzn.
MULTIS: A.J. (slightly)
VOCAB: Yurluzn (slightly)


Vote: Hard battle to choose on, because of different styles and approaches used. A.J. was by far the more creative; that storyline was throwed and unexpected. I liked all the Gods used, though there ARE some flaws. It still kept me interested and entertained. The thing is, it was entirely too short, which wasn't really your fault, but you have to learn to use the line limit to your advantage. If this topic had been given in a later round with larger line limits, I'm sure you would've killed it. Also, you seem to lack depth. It was more like a commentary than anything.
Yurluzn, I liked the depth to your story. The imagery was also pretty sick, and you kept interesting enough for me to want to read the whole thing. While your story line wasn't as original as A.J., it was still creative, and a pretty cool angle to take things. You were able to use the line limit to your your advantage and create a crazy picture. I mean, A.J. had imagery as well, but the fact that you used Gods that most people can already envision in their minds gives you a handicap. There's no need to describe how any of these Gods looked or acted. Dubz was able to take an original character and make him alive.
In the end, I thought Yurluzn took it slightly. Not taking anything away from A.J., but Dubz had a great story, while A.J. just had a concept. Even the end of A.J.'s drop was kind of dry. But I hope that A.J. takes this idea and uses it to ink a crazy drop, of infinite proportions.

Vote - Yurluzn.Bracket.

yea thats why I took the docked vote I had almost the same shit... lmao... I was like let me come up with some other shit. lmao

yea zu I was thinkin the same I thought AJ was gonna blow the water outta dude in the battle but quite a few careless errors brought him down...can be fixed and made ill in drop rhymes section...

^Yessir . . . would you like to vote so I can close this battle sooner?

he already did... lol

oh that's right, lmao.

On Topic - Tie, Both approached the topic nicely,
Vocabulary - AJ, Neither Impressed me with vocab Though.
Originality - Tie, Because although AJ had a nice concept with the names of the gods i dont think he pulled it off.. while Yurluzn went for the more expected option and had some nice twists.
Flow - Tie, simpler flow from aj but dubz' had a nicer rhyme scheme.
Multies - Yurluzn, AJ didnt really focus on multies,
Imagery - Yurluzn, his whole piece was full with imagery, this was the high point of his verse imo.
Depth - A.J, the names were a nice touch, although Hades doesnt rhyme with gates.. its HAY DEES. lol.


Vote:Yurluzn.

4-3 me

Hades, explain your vote a little more, and it will count.

Hades, explain your vote a little more, and it will count.

smh.



Yurluzn's was more captivating whereas AJ started off dope and had me enthralled with the story he COULD have created, it got a little repetitive at the second verse when he just began to name gods.. i mean if you do a god piece you may aswell make it a huge,epic battle, his flow was also shaky at times with some words not rhyming, Dubz story was better approached although slightly less original he flipped it well and had nicer imagery, his flow was on point throughout his verse.

happy?

Thank ye. Closed, 4-3 to Yurluzn.