...Genesis... vs Khárn (Topical)-(3-0 KO)

[Vokals]

Rules:
3-0 KO, 4-1 TKO, or 1st to 5
No unexplained votes, hate votes, d/ring etc etc.
Due in 48 hours from check in.. unless you take forever to check
Length 40-50 lines, **Hook optional doesnt count against lines, dialogue optional dont make it excessive**

Crews can vote, mine doesnt dick ride and I wont take any sort of biased votes. If you see a bullshit vote PM me and we'll talk about it and vise versa.

Topic:

You are an old soul in a baby, explain your thoughts and views on the world and what goes around you. What happens?



This is my check in, good luck

[Khárn]

Ceck..

Just to clarify by old soul you mean like a grown up person in a babys body?


***Yes***

[Khárn]

The Birth

Right now its quiet.. Right now its warm..
Right now its red.. im about to be born..

Damn its Cold, as a nurse holds me, arms out..
my skin a tone of blue, my life within doubt..
people scream and shout about keeping me warm..
blanket covers my body.. placed in arms of my mom..
it happened so quick, but im quiet.. no tears..
a man trapped in a babys body.. the least of my fears..
as it appears i can rememebr a life of adulthood..
my soul trapped in a child.. thinking is this bad or good..
my childhood..

Growing up

Since i left the hospital.. my life has been good..
being pushed around everywhere.. being spoonfed food..
never rude.. never spat it out.. made mum n dad proud..
never cried.. or been a nuisance.. at night never been loud..
and with my knowledge of life.. i can now fulfill my dreams..
but it means a whole other life and that aint what it seems..
my dreams turned to nightmares.. flashback of previous life..
a child thinking of death and heartache.. and cheating ex wife..
and for the first time in my life.. i cried and i cried..
wishing i was never rein-kharn-ated.. and that i just died..

Since that night everyting seemed to turn upside down..
everyone was against me.. shouting at me with frowns..
the perfect world as i knew it as a child had been lost..
now everynight i cry at nightmares.. and all at a cost..
life was lost.. i begun to see my father angry, and shout..
id sometimes have to sit there and do nothing about..
knocking out my mother.. punching her right infront of me..
this isnt what a childhoodhood should be like.. and then he..
One night before bedtime.. as i was being breatsfed..
dad hit her, i bit her nipple and was thrown into bed..
hit my head and i cried.. my flashbacks getting worse..
rein-kharn-ation isnt a gift.. its more like a curse..
so as i lay in my bed, sore head and tears in my eyes..
father placed a pillow on my head to drown out the crys..
and as i died.. this and my previous life begun flashback..
last thoughts were of evil and then everyhtign turned black..

[Khárn]

http://www.rapworlds.com/forums/show...t=41140&page=2
http://www.rapworlds.com/forums/show...t=53986&page=2

[Vokals]

Young skin but with the same thoughts and views
I remember being a tough kid who fought to choose
An 8 ball in life I was sought by cues, jabbed with sticks
Made the wrong shots and I robbed their pockets n nabbed them pricks
Now it just so happens it’s like I’m not the same person
I cant control my body now rage is burstin’
Who’s this woman that gave me birth and
My ass got slapped by this guy holdin me
Now as I gasp for breath I start to cry uncontrollably
From arms I’m pried foldin me, to see life through the eyes of another
New life, new experiences and I’m guessin a new mother
Did she birth me in this hell? Well now I think I hater
Cause I feel like a test tube baby stuck to this incubator
For some reason I remember shrinks and waiters
Must be a company ball but I don’t understand...wonder why I guess
Only if I can change my life like the butterfly effect

Hook:
Contained in a brain or caged in self insanity
Can I maintain or strain in this aged self I’m managing
Trials of life my thoughts become rituals like a rain dancer
But it feels like theirs 2 more in my head like brain cancer

I’m not getting used to this sittin here stuck in a booster seat
These are the same lips I used to kiss only if I could choose retreat
And get a grasp on this familiar feeling I’m having
Am I my father and own son cause I have a familiar feeling of daddy
But that man is nowhere to be found…
Everything goes black now there’s no familiar faces or sound
The light comes back and I hear a voice say “He’s just right”
The man looked familiar, it was my father…Jesus Christ
But I don’t understand why I’m seeing all these images
Jesus said “Your gifted in seeing all the sinning that’s did”
“Your part of me thrown in a new life form”
I felt it was a curse and at any moment I might mourn
Then in an instant I wished it and clapped amused
Immediately sent through a vortex of time landing black and bruised
Only if my eyes were gortexed* I need comfort from someone willing n able
Then mother came running screaming I hit my head from spilling the cradle

Hook:
Contained in a brain or caged in self insanity
Can I maintain or strain in this aged self I’m managing
Trials of life my thoughts become rituals like a rain dancer
But it feels like theirs 2 more in my head like brain cancer

None of this is making sense to me it’s like I have extra censories
Images of pain, hate and anger are pent up festering
Gesturing for help I am stuck in a mental blister
Just waiting to pop to drop all these memories down a mental fissure
This mental picture I’m painting is the only sense I can make
I want to jump out this body, but I only get tense and I shake
Convulsive trembles people say I cant find his pulse and render
CPR...”He needs our…” then sounds of vomiting from impulsive members
Then it paused in seconds I felt my body being uplifted
From the form I once was, strong, bold, a tough-gifted
Man but I don’t understand why I had feelings of a baby
Reincarnation maybe but I highly doubt it
Looking over my body members of my family on the ground shouting
A man in the crowd looked proud mouthing
“Your end has come now it’s time to start a new path in life”
The memories left me, with only one goal…to pass as Christ

Hook:
Contained in a brain or caged in self insanity
Can I maintain or strain in this aged self I’m managing
Trials of life my thoughts become rituals like a rain dancer
But it feels like theirs 2 more in my head like brain cancer



*Gortex makes things waterproof


links coming up, Kharn get yours

[Vokals]

ignore what i said about the links, didnt notice u had em

http://www.rapworlds.com/forums/showthread.php?t=53986

http://www.rapworlds.com/forums/show...239#post665239

[Padrino.]

Aight...

Kharn - Aight Nice Piece... For One I Seen How Little Lines You Used Which Could Hurt You if You Don't Come With It.. While Reading Your Piece I Just Felt Bored.. No Offense But It Didn't Catch Me.. It Was Like You Were Rambling On And Not Telling A Story. The Vocabulary Was Low. You Stayed On The Topic Well But It Was Just Bland. Your End Rhyme Scheme Messed Me Up While Reading Such As...

knocking out my mother.. punching her right infront of me..
this isnt what a childhoodhood should be like.. and then he..
One night before bedtime.. as i was being breatsfed..

It's Like I Have To Stop At He.. And Then Try To Pick It Back Up And Re Read It To Fit The Next Line... Not Tryin' To Knock You Just Telling You How I Felt About It.. I Know You Keyed It So It's Decent For What You Did.. And Remaing On Topic.. Beside That Good Shit Fam...


Gen- Now You Used Your Max Line Limits.. Which Is Usually An Extra Addition To What You Write.. You Can Get More In Depth With The Topic This Way.. Right From The Begining You Grasped Me With The Story.. You Told It In Such A Way That Made Me Feel Like I Was In It.. Vocabulary And Imagery Was On Point.. And The Hook Brought The Piece Together Nicely..
This Line Stood Out To Me...

From arms I’m pried foldin me, to see life through the eyes of another
New life, new experiences and I’m guessin a new mother
Did she birth me in this hell? Well now I think I hater
Cause I feel like a test tube baby stuck to this incubator

Overall Nice Battle The Both Of Ya... But My Vote Goes To Gen...

[Vokals]

1-0... up

[Tha 1ne]

First off, props to both of ya'll for staying on topic and telling the story as good as ya'll did. Great topical battle.

Kharn - You told your story very well. I can't agree with Padrino, it grabbed my attention because it was very vivid. I could picture the whole thing in my head because you provided details and it just flowed, went from one thing to another without skipping parts or anything. So definitely a great job with that. The rhyme scheme was pretty basic though. No multies or anything that I noticed, so that was a fault there. But the great story telling filled that void.

Genesis - You presented the story very good as well. Again, it was very vivid and I could picture it while I was reading. Yours had more depth as far as rhyming and had some multis tied in it so I really enjoyed that. Also, yours had more of a twist to it including Christ and everything in it. Very nice. Also the length of yours gave you an edge because it allowed you to go deeper into it and give more detail.

All in all, both of ya'll came real nice, great job to both of ya'll because these were both some good ass drops.

But.......my vote goes to: Genesis

[Khárn]

Thanx alot Fam..

Genesis - 2 / 0 - Khárn